Friday, April 17, 2009

And in other news...

I feel compelled to write Heidi Montag another inspirational letter on how to get a life and a new man. However, after watching her boyfriend Spencer Pratt and his looking-like-a-molester friend, act ‘gangsta’ on the Hills last night, I think I’ll just leave her alone for the time being. I wouldn’t want Mr. Pratt’s ‘peeps’ to come and ‘throw down hard’ on me for talking ‘smack’.

Besides, why waste time on them when there are so many other wonderful things happening!?

First of all, congratulations to Kim Kardashian for this impressive burn.
Look! It’s Magda from “Something About Mary”, meets a very Persian Ooompa Loompa.

And then there was the crazy German lady who woke up and thought, “Hey today would be a great day to hang out with some Polar bears at the Zoo during feeding time.” *thumbs ups!* Remember the alleged tiger attacks at the San Francisco Zoo in 2007? Well that’s what they are trying to call this situation, a “polar bear attack”. I felt sorry for the tigers and I once again empathize with the bears.If I was hungry and some fatty jumped all up in my food for no reason, I might get nervous and bite too, sheiiit.

And last but not least, I feel like the 90s are trying to make a comeback.Like isn’t Ginuwine trying to revive his career?Keisha Knight Pulliam allegedly has a reality TV show coming out and you will never guess who I randomly bumped into at the club last Saturday?

No big announcement or extensive MySpace flyers were sent my way. I had just so happened to be at a particular club celebrating my roomie’s bday, when towards the end of the night the DJ hit us with some old school.“This Is How We Do It!” starting blasting through the speakers and I look over to my left and Montell Jordan is in the crowd on the mic!

He only did that song, before saying he would be in the VIP if anyone wanted to come and kick it.We went down to try and get a pic and there were like only three other people around. LOL I don’t think anyone knew who he was or why he was there. Does he have a new album out? Is the economy that bad?Either way, he was still looking scrum-dayyyyumn-yummie-umptious!!!


15 comments:

Karie said...

HAAAAAAAAAA! I would eat a fatty in my food too if I were a Polar Bear.

Hadassah said...

Heidi is DUMB! I am so over the hills now !

kaytahackman said...

I heard that the woman that jumped in with the polar bear did it because she lost her job?!?!? Yeah, okay. HAH.

UMMMMMMM MONTELL JORDAN helllll yeah look at him, he hasn't aged since 1995 or whenever that song came out.

Baking With Plath said...

THIS IS FUCKING AMAZING. I'm kinda buzzed and its all because this. is. how. we. do. it.

Crowscious said...

Aw, he is HOT. and u n ur friend look very good in that pic :)

Stew said...

and here i thought he was dead

Shannon said...

this is how we do it. sha-la-la-la-laaaa

love it.

Cee.A.Don.Is said...

the hills bores me... Kim k is in the way with that paleness around her eyes and still posing like she's the baddest thing in the streets... and any dickhead that goes to the zoo to get in the cage with an animal deserves whatever happens to them, unless they escape unharmed.

jaseincase said...

If I was hungry and some fatty jumped all up in my food for no reason, I might get nervous and bite too, sheiiit.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Excellent.

I can honestly say I have never, ever watched a single moment of The Hills. I'm still not sure I fully understand what it is all about. yay me & my superiority complex. :] ha.

LOVE the blog, btw.

MsPuddin said...

Karie – for real!!

Hadassah – LOL * next blog post, my attempt to explain why I even bother watching… *

Kaytahakman – hmmmm, to some extent, that is a good explanation. She must have had a real good job, because even if the bears did kill her, it would have been long and torturous…

Baking with Plath – hey there, it was amazing, I was 12 all over again…

Crowscious – thanks!! Man I didn’t know he was so tall! Dayummm!

Stew – lol I thought that about Madonna for a long time growing up…

Shannon – oh! It’s sha-la-la-la, I always went na-na-na-la-la-laaaaa LOL tomatoe, tomato…

Cee.A – LOL why was I thinking the exact same thing about Kim? I’m like your face is fucked up, it’s time to put down the camera and pick up the alovera *sp. Posin’ like she don’t look like a puffy lobster…

Jaseincase – haha thanks. No please, go ahead and boast, because I feel dumber every time I watch that show. Like I literally should be repackaging my BS degree into the giant manila envelope it came in and send it back to the school. The Hills have destroyed what is left of my college education. As a matter of fact, I need to write a blog post explaining why I watch that damn show in the first place…no real reason, but I will feel better about myself.

YoungBlackBeauty said...

Aw man I used to LOOOOVE me some Montell. I mean I used to fantasize about him in my fifth grade math class. LOL! He is still fine though.

StephanieAnn305 said...

Thanks for that blast from the past... I for got how fine Montell was. He really hasn't aged.

Bow Chica Wah Wah said...

THIS IS TOOOO FUNNY!

MOntel Jordan is the shit!!

Sunshyne said...

that picture of the lady gettin bit is hilarious! is that bad? and Montell has been putting out music and touring overseas for quite some time, somehow I found a download for a duet he did with, wait for it..........................................................Cece Peniston! lol

Monie said...

Well, damn, Montell. LOL!