Sunday, May 18, 2008

Things not to do, because I’ve done them and they worked out not so much…

Ok I don’t why I thought I was Kid n Play in the club last night, but don’t ever do this, drunk, in four-inch heels…


Yes I fell and busted my ass. Not cute.

Also, don’t go out drinking two nights in a row, then wake up to go and do a 10 hour bar shift. Not fun. Making cocktails after a night of drinking is like having sex after eating Thanksgiving dinner.

Hangover + martini shaker = barf.

Furthermore, I’m a completely selfish b*tch btw. I met this guy a while ago, who lives like a couple hours away. We’ve managed to keep in touch via technology. Cyber dating, I guess. Anyway, he called me out of the blue last night to tell me that he wanted to come hang out. I told him I was going out with my girl, but he was welcome to tag along.

To make a long story short, he drove out to my city and was a total gentleman. Opened my car door, offered to buy me drinks and looked past the fact that I was a total drunken party whore.

After he walked me to my door, I told him that I was tired and should probably pass out since I had to work in the morning. I didn’t think twice about the fact that it was 2 a.m. and he had a two-hour drive ahead of him. I totally went upstairs and passed out. I woke up the next morning to text messages and missed calls about him possibly crashing on my couch.

Whoops!! My bad.

So tell me, how was your weekend? Anybody else learn any lessons that involve alcohol and a sex driven donkey??? Wait what?

40 comments:

James Tubman said...

1st
my life now has purpose

Skinny Girl said...

LOL, you are a hoot Ms Pud.

S X

She W0rd Hustlez said...

Lol, I'm glad you made it through. Hope dude made it home safely.

12kyle said...

@ MsP
My weekend was tame compared to yours. LOL

I hung out with Mizrepresent and Eb the Celeb for Eb's bday party at a local club. I had a good time. I even displayed a few moves on the dance floor. LoL

btw...poor fella. He was just lookin to crash on the floor. Haaaaaa. U r wrong, Ms P! LOL

Muze said...

you are hilarious.

poor man.

and for the first time in a long time, i had a very eventful weekend.

now all i have to do is seduce kanye on thurs and life will be complete...

lol.

sad thing is, i'm serious. ha.

Bella said...

Aw, that sounds like a fun-filled weekend!

I'll be doiin' that in 2 weeks in Cancun!

=) Bella

MsPuddin said...

james- awesome.

skinny girl- I try ;p

she word- yeah, and he still talks to me, go figure...

12k- really? aw I wish I could have been there...I woulda worked it out w ya lol

mze- get it girl. he's single!!!! lol hay it could happen, I have faith. Just flash him that tummy of yours...

bella- don't even play, because I will be in Cabo in 2weeks!!!

karrie b. said...

lmao. ive totally done the kid and play dance numerous times in the club. it was successful once...

he can excuse you...i think drunk is my number 1 excuse for everthing, and it usually always works...

-KB

Lady Cameleon said...

I did it and didnt fall Ms. P, you had me rolling!!!!

12kyle said...

@ MsP
The pics are deceiving. I was NOT backin it up. I was doing a move that y'all know nuffin about. I learned it from Mike Jackson in '86. LMAO!!

But I did cut a rug. haaaaaa

Don said...

i bet dude was madder than a mofo. lol. @ least you enjoyed some hours of sleep before work. that's what counts.

Cunning_Linguist said...

I really never pictured you a Kid or a PLay, per se. It's good to see you're still keeping up enough good times for us boring folk. *wink*

Stew said...

@ karrie - dont think that will always work

too bad for dude, but he should have figured out where he was going to sleep before he even came. you two have to split the blame on that one.

regular weekend for me. i kinda hate the fact that i do not get drunk anymore. did not think i would miss it this much.

looks like i will have to try harder.

dessex said...

damn a 2 hr drive...he must really like you

ms.uncensored said...

lmao. u are my hero for the drunk kid n play in 4 inch heels. i find it amazing that i can stand up all night in them under the influence. forget dancing.

as for the "poor guy". he'll get over it. passin out was more important at the time. lol

Slausin-Ass Slaus said...

...... you should be happy he didnt slash all your dang tires.

WendyB said...

Ooh, you naughty girl!

yes said...

lmao his bad

eclectik said...

I love and perfected the "wait. what?"
I heart you

My weekend was feh.

But I will tell you gettin drunk and playing Nintendo Wii is the Troof!

Hey Nanner Nilla Wafer

e.

Preposterous Ponderings said...

So has he called ya back yet girl?

He thought he was gonna get some bootie but found out right quick like that he wasn't.

He's gonna send you a bill for those drinks now you know.

Kieya said...

LOL wow, he got played lovely

Krissyface said...

getting silly on margaritas and spending time on facebook is not worth writing about. OOPS, I just outed myself as a total loser. Damnit!

c.watson said...

Ha you always make me laugh. I so want to go drinking with you I think it would be quite the adventure.

Jadore.Tokeyo said...

WOW!!! lol

i feel so sorry for the guy

Ms Smack said...

I loved that you tube clip! Made me feel like bustin' a move, hehe.

Sounds like a memorable weekend!

At least you made it home safe, eh?

Thanks for the mothers day wishes!

Your mother getting the rodent via the cat was hilarious!

KIKI said...

I completely forgot what the hell I did this past weekend after reading "...and sex driven donkey..." LMAO

I swear sometimes you're sicker than I am...

And now you know you gone have to give that man some the next time you see him to make up for being so rude & selfish. Then again...you know me...always lookin for a reason to give a man some...*shrugs*

MsPuddin said...

@ karrie it does! I’m drunk all the time. Wait, let me keep that to myself…

@lady c you got lucky, I shoulda taken you down w me…

@12k what’s that move? The “scoot scoot scoot”

@ don I know I would have been mad…actually no I wouldn’t, cuz if it were me I straight would have been bangin on the door…

@cunning ling well hello there, back from the mini vacay?

@stew I like your logic, I almost don’t feel as bad

@dessex right? Hi btw…

@ms c I was breakin in some new pumps too, don’t know what I was thinking…

@ lmao! I wish a nigga would, I do…

@wendy yum! ;p

@ yes ok! His bad…

@ e lol yeah I had to regroup after I put that out there…luv ya lots!

@pp yeah he called the next day, what can I say. I must have turned him on with my kid n play moves…

@kieya it was beautiful

@krissy oh you dirrrty girl! I won’t tell…

@ c.wat yes every night is an adventure, but its kind of dangerous.

@jadore what about me!? Whaaaaaaaaa! Lol

@ ms smack right? Ok that happened, but I don’t remember posting about it. Lol wow.

@kiki I knew you would like that. We are both fired, but can’t rape the willing ;p

Afrodite said...

My weekend was nowhere near as exciting and hilarious as yours. Sex-driven donkey? WTF?

G-Sweet said...

almost 4got how fly the kid and play dance was...lol!

i.can't.complain. said...

im a firm believer that whoever u are while drunk is who u really are.

so while he may have been a fantastic guy, the real ms. P knows he should've taken his tail back to his town.

things like that have a way of working out.

im sure he made it home safe.

yeah, i learned a few things about sex this weekend.

goodness.

-1-

Demon Hunter said...

LOL. Sounds like one hell of a weekend, Ms. P. ;*)

Eb the Celeb said...

LMAo but I would have rather seen video of you and not the vid from the movie...

hahaahah

Queen of My Castle said...

Awwwww, poor guy.

I bet his feelings were hurt and/or he was pretty pissed.

Suite B said...

I'm not really sure what to say. Should ask why would not invite that man to stay over or should I ask what in the hell made you post a old House Party video...and who is the person that took the time to put this on Youtube...REALLY

Don said...

@ mspuddin: lol. me too!!

James Tubman said...

sorry for not responding earlier

i have a drinking problem too lol

a few times i got so drunk in a bar that i sat on the toilet for more than three hours straight

with my pants down lol

it was embarasing when my cousin had to pull me out one time


everytime he thinks of that moment he just laughs at me

and i stand there sulking in personal humiliation lol

my advice, if you think it's really bad go to alcohol anonymous meetings in your area (seriously)

the stories will scare you straight

i still drink but i'm not as bad as i used to be

Qucifer said...

um my weekend involved getting sex by "by the side means" and kicking beefy OUT OUT OUT

Pronto said...

Donkey?

I don't get it.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

Dude, Ive had MANY a weekend like this.

dejanae said...

lol
now whatnahell made u think that that would be a good move?
smh

awww
poor guy
ida offered hima cup of coffee
then tell him to get his ass to his own house