Friday, April 4, 2008

Are you kidding?

Ok I know that I look like I could pass for about eighteen or nineteen. I get carded at dive bars and on a good day I could be celebrating my 21st birthday over and over again. I look young for my age. I do. Not that I’m old or anything, I’ve got some years left before I’m back in diapers, but I do have a “babyface”.

And I’ll admit that I am also soft spoken. Yes, believe it or not I have this soft sexy voice that makes men gravel at my feet with diamonds. And caviar. And sometimes they stay down there and suck on my toes.

Unfortunately, my sexy DJ voice only works for the guys and the rest of the time people are like, “what did you say!?” or “huh, I can’t hear you!” So with my soft voice and post puberty vibe, sprinkled with a little bit of nice, people tend to treat me a certain way in the restaurant business. It’s ok, for the most part this comes along with the job. I’m used to people assuming I’m twelve.

So anyway, a friend of mine hooked me up with a job at this nice French restaurant. So far I like it, everyone is cool and it’s decent money. My boss is a cool guy. He’s about business, but he knows how to take a joke. Now don’t get me wrong I like the guy, but last night I sure did have to bite my tongue when I asked him for something and he said, “I’ll be there in a minute, kid.”

KID? Did this fool just call me kid? You know I’ll take honey, baby cakes, even sugar lips, before I let anyone call me kid. I hate it when older people call me kid. I get it, I look like I just got my drivers license, but this isn’t the 1920s. I mean, give me some credit, I do have boobs. Yes, they’re in there, somewhere, f*cker.

* sigh * Well at least I have a job…

28 comments:

anonymousnupe said...

All I say is, enjoy it now. You'll yearn for your youth later (especially your liver).

Folk said...

LOL! a lot of that goes around. even in corporate America. I often call trainees "my children" even though some of them are much older than me. However, in corporate America so many people act like children.

go figure.

Krissyface said...

The first time a guy at a beer store didn't ask for my ID, I cried. Then they start calling you ma'am. And you have to start hitting people.

Sabina said...

Not long ago, I was standing in front of the middle school near my apartment, and a hall monitor yelled at me to get inside because I was late for school. I also got carded at the movies last year. Don't you only have to be 17 for that? It's annoying, but then you can always pleasantly surprise people with your maturity and wisdom.

Demon Hunter said...

Enjoy the kid thing now. Because being call Ma'am is traumatizing at best! LOL...

Hex said...

All I can think of is that one lady cop from all those old Police Academy movies with the really quiet voice who seemed timid until you pissed her off, and then she was all like

I SAID PUT YOUR HANDS UP, DIRTBAG!!!!

Lady Cameleon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lady Cameleon said...

So you would have rathered him say "Be there in a minute Sugar Lips"......lmao...nah j/p............people at my job do that to NOT only that the dentist used that term to when i got my tooth "extracted" from my damn mouth........i was thinking "fool surving this damn tooth pain and this extraction prooves me to be a damn adult" !!!! Get it right OLDIE !!!!

Eb the Celeb said...

hey kiddo...lol just playing

but yeah...that's straight disrespect... he knows how old you are, you had to fill out a damn application... if your all working together your grown... point blank period!

Afrodite said...

You're a better person than I. That sweetie, honey, sugar lips stuff would not fly but yeah, at least you have a job, lol!

Maxie said...

I get "kid" all the time and I don't think I look that young either. Who knows.

kayellejaye said...

As old as I feel right now,if my boss called me 'Kid' I'd prolly cry tears of joy.

Enjoy it while you can. Getting old really chaps my ass.

12kyle said...

Could've been worse...he could've said "kiddo" or "shawty" LMAO!!!

Slausin-Ass Slaus said...

Man yall some touchy ass touchies.

I call every body " baby, baby girl, baby girl lady person." well not every body.. cuz im not trying to get slapped.

But i wish someone WOULD call me kid.

hate when i get called sir. ugh... im old

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

You can be childlike. But you're no kid!

It's part of your charm, BP.

MsPuddin said...

nupe- yeah yeah yeah…I know, that’s what everyone tells me…

folk- I know right…I have my mature moments, but I’m a grown ass woman dawg lol

krissyface- lol whoa, yeah I don’t get ma’am yet, I get “excuse me miss”, which I don’t like either…

sabina- laughing at you getting carded at the movies, whoever carded you must have been on their high horse, because I’ve never been carded, not even when I was younger…

demon hunter- yeah I get miss not ma’am

hex- lol yeah that’s me, once I get comfortable around you I’m LOUD…

lady c- yeah lol and was he talking to you while you had hella sh*t in your mouth? I hate that…

eb- girrrl, I was about to say lol…I know he knows how old I am, whatever…

afro- in the restaurant business you just got to let a lot of sh*t slide off. It’s funny because in the back all the employees are cussing people out lol

maxie- maybe it has something to do with our personalities, but that makes me feel a little better…

kayelle- damn you make getting older sound like torture…

12k- shawty! Lol I could not picture that man saying shawty…

slaus- yeah you’ve called me babycakes, I don’t know, since its you its ok. Matter of fact I think you’ve called me kid… * thinks about it * yeah you have! Kid.

bugs butt- I’m going to take that as a compliment…;p

Muze said...

yeah i get that too. but when i went to the casino the other day and the guy didn't ask for my i.d., but asked for my friggin 31 year old bf's id, i dang near burst out into tears.

lol. so enjoy it.

marky said...

A French place somewhere around San Mateo....or just tell me the name of the restaurant so I can come in and eat and take you home....sugar lips.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

OH. When someone calls me "kid" unless its someone my age, cause then its more of a chatty/nickname thing, it makes me INSANEly angry.

maverick said...

ha ha ha ha...tht must ve been funny :D

congrats on getting the new job...

btw blog updated :)

Torrance Stephens bka All-Mi-T said...

yes u do have a job and look good, im old as dirt and i got carded two times yesterday, bouth after i had gotten my shave

Babyfaced said...

TRUST ME
I feel your pain. I can never lie about my age, because no one believes my age now.

I've even been carded for GAS! Petrol, Fuel. That was the lowest moment..... well one of them.

Mister Underhill said...

Sorry, sugar thighs. Won't happen again.

Hadassah said...

Oh gurl! you know what it means you going to look 30 when you in your late 40's lol!

Z'maji of HauteBlogXOXO said...

Yes you do have boobs Puddin' and what heavy and full tiddies they are, THANK YA JESUS!

*pours Mrs. Buttazwurf down Puddin's cleavage*

P.S. I know you were talking about something but they you said boobs and that's all I remembered

Qucifer said...

Aaaawww At least you don't have an accent ..... or like my brother in law, sound like an 80 year old infirm grandma!

MsPuddin said...

muze- if you started crying that might make you seem younger…

marky- damn your good, but no can do. Sugar lips, now I like the sound of that…

chelsea- yes, it makes me violent…

mav- thanks, lets hope it works out…

torrance- hmmm, some guys look good with facial hair and some don’t…

babyface- maybe you looked suspicious when you were buying gas. Was it at 2am and your eyes were blood shot red? I don’t know…

mister u- as long as its not thunder thighs ;p or kid

hadassah- 30s the new 20! Yeah I hope this whole baby face thing pays off…

z- lol I did say boobs and I’m glad someone noticed these suckers…

q- sometimes accents work for ppl…oooo, 80-yr-old grandma sounds hot!!!

MsPuddin said...

Z'maji- PS is that you in your default??? or trent? lol j/p