Thursday, August 23, 2007

What is up with your eye?

Today was the first day back to school. Summer is officially over.

So naturally I spent my last day of freedom in a bar. (Well not the whole DAY, more like the afternoon, a little bit of the evening and a majority of the night). Where I met yet another intriguing guy. Who after a few minutes of talking with him I noticed he kept checking out every-single-moving-vagina-that-passed-by.

I don’t care, two beers or ten, I still noticed. I mean I do understand that we are in a bar and we just met, but um hello! I am still standing here talking to you. If I don’t do it for you buddy just say so. My beer and I will be happy to go elsewhere.

He could have at least had the decency to make it a little less obvious. So what if she was tall, blond and could probably knock-me-out with her melons, they are only clumps of fat. Well in her case, clumps of Tupperware.

Do men really get distracted that easily?

Never mind, silly of me to ask such a question. Yes of course they do. Tight jeans, stilettos and a tub top are kryptonite in a bar.

My cousin in fact confirmed the “wandering eye syndrome” for me yesterday. He was complaining to me that they hired this hot new chick at his job. Incidentally she’s also recently divorced and he is her supervisor, which means a majority of his time is spent with her.

“Why are you complaining,” I asked. “Would you rather work with her or some big sweaty guy named Bubba”?

“I do work with a bunch of crusty old guys named Steve, Jeff or John,” he said. “And she’s pretty to look at, she flirts. It's just annoying because she's off-limits for a few different reasons.”

( a) he’s married b) he’s married and c) he’s married).

“It doesn’t mean I can’t check her out though,” he said.

Men...

8 comments:

country roads said...

a glance here and there is more excusable than out and out staring. Obviously the guy at the bar has no clue about being a guy.

And the other guy that works with the hottie? As much as I'd like to work with a hottie, it's too much...I've seen that movie before.

anonymousnupe said...

Yeah, yeah, and chicks don't do the same thing, right? Please. It was inconsiderate of bar dude, granted, uh, but whaddaya expect at a bar? I mean, it’s a bar. Free range. Easy-prey salmon swimming upstream to spawn. The library or Caribou Coffee are the places to stalk if it’s (potentially) a more refined, considerate, genteel breed you seek.

c j. said...

i once dated someone with a really extreme case of WE (wandering eye) to the point i kept following his gaze thinking there was something going on everywhere else in the bar. and there was. women.
his WE was somewhat amusing until my neck started hurting from craning it so much. then, i decided to make a subtle remark (you moron, is that my elbow in your eye socket or you just slipped from the bar stool?). he explained, very self-convincingly, he had a really hard time focusing on one single thing at the time.
i ordered several very expensive cocktails right away.

Bella said...

You know, even a BAR should have some etiquette...

Anonymous said...

Because of their body chemistry and hormones, men develop lead deposits in their eyes. This causes them to constantly drift downwards. We try to pull them up, but they just go down again. Like Chinese hookers.

Muze said...

hmmm...yeah i mean it is a bar, but if he's trying to talk to you, he should be trying to talk to you, not looking all over the bar at other stilettos walking past. geesh!

and about working with the hot girl...well, at least he's acknowledging that she's off limits because he is married. now, that he is annoyed by it is a different thing....

UBERMOUTH said...

Ms. Puddin' my blog address has changed to ubermouthreturns@blogspot.com. Could you please update? Ty

Just a Girl said...

rude for the guy in the bar to do that while talking to you if he was 'leading you on'.
but i don't see a problem with anyone checking out who is in the joint or harmless flirting with a co-worker for that matter. flirting does not equal sex. it may lead to sex but it does not equal sex.