Monday, October 8, 2007

I Get Money

What happened to me? I decided to write something of substance. Something with meaning and stuff.

Unfortunately, the only thing I could think of is, I have yet another job! (Technically the third one only makes two and a half). I know, I know, why don’t I get a sugar daddy already? Well, I’m really enjoying building character and learning to work well with others. And when I buy my own sh*t, like a $200 pair of shoes, I don’t feel guilty.

What is my half job?
I‘ve taken up go-go dancing. Yes, Ms Puddin’ has been shakin’ her ass in her underwear, in the club, on a Saturday night. I’m a hustla baby! Go-go dancing is kind of like killing three birds with one stone. 1). I get paid to do it. 2). I don’t have to go to the gym. 3). I get to go to the club for free! The best part about that last point is that I don’t have to deal with all the lame guys in the club, because the dancers have security all to themselves. I also don’t get drinks spilled down my shirt, because I don’t even have to wear a shirt. (I wear a bra, booty shorts and some go-go boots).

If I had a man, he would appreciate this sweet piece of ass. Matter of fact, bottle blonde said it best when she listed the qualities in a man who she would get on her knees for. Someone who showers and who thinks I’m funny. Not funny looking.

So anyway, back to shakin’ my ass. Can someone please tell me why only females hit on me Saturday night? (That was a rhetorical question. Please refrain from actually responding). Yes, while I was dancing one girl slapped my ass, another insisted I let her buy me a drink, while their other friend kept pointing out my dancing skills to people unknown. Between stares she would snap pictures of me on her digital.

I did say I was thinking about crossing over to the other side, but when the opportunity presented itself I sort of froze up. I wasn’t prepared for it to be so easy. Well, drunk girls in the club are potentially easy…It was just so sudden I wasn't prepared.

I would also like to add my body feels like I got beat up by Hulk Hogan in a WWF showdown. I am really, really sore. I should have stretched, before dancing. However, I don't stretch before sex, so I don't see how this would be any different?

So much for writing a post of substance. Somehow in the last few hundred words I managed to write about sex, dancing half naked and (unintentional) lesbianism. Oh well, how was your weekend?

15 comments:

Don said...

"I'ma hustler baby. Just want you to know. It aint where I've been. But where I'm 'bout to goooo..."

Do your thang, MsP. You and bottleblonde really have a way with the word play.

You have a personality which seems to insist you are a great dancer. I have never seen a go-go dancer. Maybe I know it by a different name or something. Babygirl, we are men; we need some pictures of you on stage. LOL.

STILL_POCAHONTAZ said...

Ms P, you never cease to amaze me..I can live vicariously through you..LOL, you go girl!

Torrance Stephens bka All-Mi-T said...

"I get money, I get money, I get money Ahhhh" Shop Boyz.

you can shake tha hang for me anytime and i may be even to assist u on a daily basis

Kitty said...

Hot bitches in da club?

Please let me know the name and address of this club MsP - I think I would be loving it quite hard.

Aren't women a bunch of old whores?? People are often amazed at the lack of effort that's required for me to pick up a fiesty young lady for an evening of getting to know each other better.

Of course, men are even easier...I love being a chickie!!!

BottleBlonde said...

A GO-GO DANCER?! Do you know how HOT that is? I overheated just reading this. You know you're hot when you have chickies in the club all up in your poon.

P.S. THANK YOU for the shout-out! I owe you one, my go-go dancing diva.

P.P.S. And thank YOU for the shout-out too, Don! I owe you a lap dance.

So@24 said...

I love how you state that sex = dancing.

Shit, I hope that isn't the case. At least in my case. I'm a horrible dancer.

Welp, time to hit up the Hollywood go go dancing scenes!

MsPuddin said...

don- unfortunately I’m going to have to leave this one to your imagination. If it helps go on youtube and download a music video with a club scene…

still_pocahontaz- ok, but get ready to drink lots and lots of coffee…

torrance stephens- that’s that new jam! Lol they played it while I was dancing…

kitty- I don’t know what is easier, a man, or a woman under the influence…

bottleblonde- are you sure it wasn’t menopause? I kid, I kid. Your welcome, that post had me crackin’ up…

so@24- no, no, no you got it all wrong. I meant the actual act of dancing hurt my body, not that being a bad dancer means your bad in bed.

G-Sweet said...

Now u actually get paid for ur club debauchery... good 4 u... now if I can jus get paid for flirtin' wit big booty black girls, I'll be rich!... hahaha!... might even be able to work where u work...lol

But on a more serious note... I get paid for doin something I love doin... so what a coincidence!

UBERMOUTH said...

Maybe it's a lesbian dive?<----- look, I made a pun!

Muze said...

this is why i love your blog. you rock for being a go-go dancer....and for being able to buy a $200 pair of shoes. (damn 9 to 5!)

go-go dancing is awesome. i've only done it once but i had a ball. bf was not having it as a regular thing though. lol.

BottleBlonde said...

Lesbian dive! BAHAHAHAHA!

Actually, I'm fairly certain it wasn't menopause (for once). Earlier, I dabbed some cayenne pepper on my chia pet. Hence the overheating.

country roads said...

I'm totally on the wrong side of the country.

MsPuddin said...

G- Wassup homie!? First of all lol I don’t even drink when I dance, it’s work. It’s tiring. If I was drunk I would not make it through the night. I know what you re thinking, but I aint drink in a min…what are you doing?

Ubermouth- def. not a dive, but you pun about lesbian poon was awesome…

Muze- yeah I was always the drunk girl in the club climbing on the bar and the security would have to make me get down…lol

Bottleblonde- you worry me, cayenne pepper and chia pet should never be in the same sentence…

Country roads- lol Cali is not quite like in the movies, but we still gets down!

Opinionated Diva said...

LOL! Wow..I'm so laughing at you not stretching before sex so you thought it was the same with dancing!

G-Sweet said...

FBP... "what are you doing?"...


I finally got this job @ his video game company (after a f*cking year)... so i get paid hella good 2 do some shit i do anyway!..


ps. ohhhh yea i got a full time graveyard job now...lol (yea i know doin 2 much!)