Friday, January 11, 2008

When it rains, I get random phone calls...

Yesterday was a strange day. I actually went to work on time. I didn’t do much all day but sit at my desk watching the rain sprinkle onto the pavement and cars splash puddles on pedestrians. I did, however, witness a few couples screaming their brains out at each other in front of the building.

At my day job the office is joint with attorneys and therapists. Random? I know. Around lunchtime there was a couple who had just finished up a counseling session and started walking out the front door when I got a phone call. I’m on the phone with my friend for maybe about ten minutes before I finally tune into the yelling coming from right out in front of the building. I look out the window, the couple is still standing outside and the husband is ripping the wife another one.

I wish a n*gga would, in public, after a therapy session. So he growls around for about ten more minutes, when eventually they split off and go in separate cars.

Divorce! * cough * *cough * Divorce!

Then not even like five minutes later I hear a woman, with tears streaming down her face, walk past the office window. She’s screaming at someone behind her in a whiny voice, “you never listen to me!” Walking a few feet behind her is (I’m guessing) her man, who is like, “yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.”

The irony of the day is that married guy called me. Whoa, talk about random and awkward. Unless it is a position I wake up in after a night of drinking, I don’t do awkward.

I don’t even know why I answered. I knew it was his number, I guess I was just bored at work. For those of you that don’t know, this is the same guy who didn’t brush his teeth for a week because he used his toothbrush to clean his watch. The same guy who married his wife because she cleaned his Jordans without him asking. (Oh wow! She’s a keeper! Is that all I have to do to get a man? Clean his shoes and buy him a toothbrush?)

Well, if his title doesn’t already give it away, he’s the guy who casually tossed in the fact he was married after we were already dating for three months. Bastard. And let’s be honest I was kind of deep in it when he told me, so yes, the relationship lingered at little bit longer.

Why did he call? He basically wanted to apologize for how things ended between us. He felt bad about our situation and wanted to treat me to dinner or a movie. Something about preserving our friendship because I made him happy. All I really heard through the phone was, blah, blah, blah, dinner, blah, blah, blah. Whatever, I’m over it.

On another note…

21 comments:

maverick said...

interesting...well glad to knw the conversation was blah blah for u...its good tht it sounded like tht to u....

well the world has a lot of ppl who keep doing stupid things...n i gues the phone call by him cud b added to the heap of stupidity :)
btw updated my blog..n ve blogrolled u :)

Deutlich said...

Married Guy? He's a fucking douche. Who wants to feast on scraps?

Meh.

I'm sorry you had to go through that..

em said...

Married people are idiots. Oh wait. . I'm married.

But yeah. . .don't even answer next time. I don't buy that -just calling because he feels bad- crap.

Diva said...

That sucks, girl. I don't know if I would have answered or not. If I had answered, I'd have told him he was more than welcome to buy me dinner and to mail me a gift card to my favorite place to scarf, with enough money on it so that I could take my new flame with me.

LosingIt said...

Agreed with the others--Married men who cheat are scoundrels. You definitely deserve someone worth your time. Hang up on his sorry ass next time and then, for good measure, go kiss someone who brushes their teeth.

Muze said...

wow, here i was thinking that i'm old fashioned for wanting to get married when they're giving away husbands for a toothbrush and clean jordans? and i don't even have to buy the jordans? wow. cool.

now if i can only get my bf to start wearing jordans. that's a sure in! lol.

anyhoo, that guy is an idiot. blah is right. and your day must be interesting everyday if you get to catch all the post-therapy arguments.

but wait, aren't therapists supposed to help?

Slaus of O Hell Nawl said...

Yeah sounds to me like he is attempting to put you in "get booty in case of emergency position"

We married men think we are slick. I watch my boys who are also married try to get away with the dumbest shyt ever. Where I then have to think...damn man. fugg you get married for?

I know as men we are always going to have urges to shift someone elses uterus from time tot ime but hell let it just be that: a thought.

keep it moving...
wait that shyt came out way too mature... i dont want yall to get it twisted.

labia

Torrance Stephens bka All-Mi-T said...

thats what u get for being a mac momma LOL

Ms. Behaving said...

Hmpff!!! The nerve of that married bastid!!!

Ms.Lady said...

wooow...he definitely wants some booty...see why im not interested in marriage?? caint trust nobody mayne!!

Laughing through my chardonnay said...

Ahhh! Married Guy!! WTF?? I just don't get it.

MsPuddin said...

maverick- yes there are a lot of stupid people out there. Thank god I’m not one of them…

deutlich- I’m sorry too. That’s why it was so random, it happened a long time ago. Weird. Thanks though.

em- I’m assuming that I just happen to witness all the bad relationships, because I’m sure you and your husband are very bright…

diva- I know, I think I’m too nice. Sometimes I have to slap myself around and say, “be mean and scary!” I should have but from him? I really don’t want nathin…

losingit- mmmm a man who brushes his teeth. That’s hot…

muze- lol your man looks tall, I’m surprised he doesn’t already wear Jordans? And um yeah I thought the therapists were supposed to help too. That’s why I was surprised to see that couple leave their session arguing…

slaus- the funny thing is that married men ARE slick, but men in general are retarted.

Seriously, your not going to answer your phone, on a Friday night? And when I hop the fence to your apt. building to see wassup, you leave the front door unlocked and that b*tch is in your bed? Wow.

That did sound mature, til the labia shout out…

torrance- I try, I try…

ms.b- the nerve! Have me playing the "why me" card...

ms. lady- yeah, he wanted some alright. I’m not all into the marriage thing either…

chard- ?????!

Slaus of O Hell Nawl said...

Maybe married men other than me are slick. that's why I dont even try.

I get busted trying to lie about whether the Pear nectar I buy is on sale or not!!

wife: was this bojie azz pear nectar even on sale? it's $6.00!

me: Uhm.. like .. define sale? The SOLD it to me so technically it was for sale.

Wifey : I didnt say anything about FOR sale Slaus. I asked was it ON sale?

me: huh?

when i busted, thats the first thing I say: huh?

i aint slick at all

G-Sweet said...

im wit slaus... hes just settin up "SEX!"... he prolly' misses hittin it so he gettin back in position... trust me!...

if he's married he aint supposed to be goin to dinner and a movie wit nobody but his wife...

i act up sometimes but i dont play wit marriage tho...

remember how he ended it... okay... enough said!

(that was the very 1st blog that i read when ii got on here)

Drea said...

Umm yeah can we day "Oh hell nah!!!" That nigga is just wack as all hell!

Preposterous Ponderings said...

Men are all the same!

Sorry guys,but it's true.

G-Sweet said...

PP... thats preposterous!

c.watson said...

This is why you should never go to work on time, it just royally screws up the rest of your day.

And off to alcohol, but no worries, there is no fire planned for tonight.

Qucifer said...

Ughh You also have a Married one that pops up randomly




...I wish a fool WOULD call me right at this moment so I could tell him yet again to try and go fuck him pregnant wife instead of buggin my ass about "we should talk and I could come see your new place"

KoffeeDyme said...

They always come back when the thing they had in the past was that good...
jeez now i'm so dang scared... It seems that those are the type of dudes i tend to attract...

Sojourner G said...

MSP-seen you around errwhere and decided to pop in for a look. I like! Pretzel? Tools? Hilarious.